Dealing With Unmet Expectations

Andy & I just celebrated our first year of marriage last weekend, and what a sweet and growing last year it was! A common misconception about your first year of marriage is that it will be the hardest year of your marriage… that wasn’t the case for us! Hard is not a word I would use to describe our marriage, even though we did walk through hard seasons and lots of unmet expectations. 

Today, as I am further reflecting on our first year of marriage, I wanted to write a blog post normalizing how marriage can be SO fun, but come with hard seasons, growth, and unmet expectations. 

Let’s rewind!! My husband and I participated in a premarital class called Merge where we learned to identify our unmet expectations in 3 categories: unrealistic, unaware, & unspoken. Unrealistic expectations are exactly as they sound - expectations that are unrealistic thus go unmet. Unaware expectations are often where I find myself as I won’t realize that I had an expectation on XYZ until it doesn't happen that way and I am disappointed or discouraged. Unspoken expectations are ones where you don’t say them because you are wanting to “keep the peace” or you assume the other person knows exactly what you're thinking… newsflash! No one can read someone else’s mind. My caveat to this is that not every expectation that is unmet will fit into these categories; sometimes life happens and things just don’t go as you expected. 

This is one of the biggest lessons and areas of growth in our first year of marriage. Starting with our wedding day and our honeymoon. As one could imagine, any bride and groom would expect to have the most perfect wedding day (maybe a bit unrealistic). No bride would imagine that her groom would have COVID or some sort of nasty cold and a fever on her wedding day. Nor would she imagine guests would RSVP yes but not come. Nor would she imagine that the speakers wouldn’t work properly for her reception. All these things were true of our wedding day, but at the of the day, I got to marry my best friend. We were joined in oneness to glorify the Lord together for life, and that has been something that has well-exceded our expectations. Looking back, hindsight is 20/20, and we still got married even though our wedding day wasn’t exactly as we expected.

The same goes for our honeymoon. Not all things went as we had expected. Andy was still sick, I got sick later in the week, and we ended the week with my new husband having food poisoning… not the ideal honeymoon let me tell you! Even though the honeymoon wasn’t as we expected healthwise, we were still able to relish in our marriage and enjoy our time together. For most of our time, we were able to push through being sick and go on some pretty cool excursions! We went swimming with whale sharks, scuba diving with sea turtles and sharks, adventuring into underwater caves, and so much more! Our time spent in our resort was nothing short of restful! On days where we weren’t on an excursion, we were 24/7 at the poolside! Regardless of how the honeymoon ended, we cultivated memories as husband and wife that we will never forget & now get to look back and laugh at! 

When we tell our honeymoon story, a common response I get from people is, “I’m so sorry!” But honestly, I’m not because I feel like it set us up with the right expectations in marriage that we will have unmet expectations, but that doesn’t mean that our lives are over or that God is any less faithful. Instead, we were able to build a foundation of working through unmet expectations that allowed us to have a better perspective when others came up in the first year of marriage, such as, travel expenses, learning new rhythms, things breaking once you own a house, unexpected health diagnoses, etc. So many things have come up this year that we would both say were not what we expected to experience in our first year of marriage, and yet we look back and are so grateful for how the Lord grew us individually and together. 

In every unmet expectation, I am reminded of the sovereignty of God. He is never panicked or caught off guard when things don’t go as we planned. He is all-knowing, and he has every ounce of our lives planned out. He is in control of all things, and we can trust him. A blog post for another day is my struggle with control, but what a gift of a year to be reminded that it is good for God to be in control and not me. “He goes before all things and by Him, all things go together.” Colossians 1:17

XO, Em

Our Hydrangea Wedding - Details That Made Our Day Special

My husband and I got married in August of 2024 - almost a year ago! It is a little wild how it has almost been a year. Over the next few weeks, I will be posting different blogs about my wedding as a walk down memory lane. 

We planned the wedding ourselves, and let me tell you, it was quite the endeavor! I found myself often stressed a little too much about the little things and intricate details. Take it from me, an overachieving perfectionist, that your wedding day will be perfect no matter what happens because you are getting to marry your best friend and enter into a covenant with him forever! Not to get too sappy, but looking back, so many things went wrong on our wedding day, and yet I remember all the little details that made the day special for Andy and I. I want to share the personalized details from our special day in hopes of inspiring you for your special day :)

10 Details That Made August 11th Feel Special

First look with my husband, my dad, and my bridesmaids | 

This was something that was super important for me! I knew I wanted a special moment with everyone involved in our wedding. We opted to do first looks with my dad and bridesmaids, as well as my husband. 

I did the first look with my dad first, and he sobbed. It was a sweet moment I got to share with him as I gave him his Father of the Bride gift. See #5 for inspo! Next I did a first look in my dress with my bridesmaids! I hadn’t shown them what it looked like yet, and let’s just say this dress is not what they thought I’d pick out! Finally, I did my first look with Andy. We did this in the chapel where we got married, and it was intimate and sweet. We got about an hour together to sit and relish in the fact that we were about to become husband and wife, pray together, and share our personal vows to one another. 11/10 recommend doing a first look with your spouse!

All of our first looks!

Our written details | 

I love a good letter! Especially to the people who we love deeply. For each of our guests, we had a place card letter thanking them for how they have invested in our relationship and in our walks with the Lord. This letter greeted each of our guests as they sat at their seats for the reception. We also decided to handwrite our bridal party letters to have them as their place cards at the head table. At the moment, it felt tedious because we had 9 girls and 9 guys, but it was a meaningful detail we don’t regret as we got to express to each of them what they mean to us :) 

Upon entering the wedding ceremony, I had two friends handing out our programs which I designed to look like a newspaper. This was a simple and creative addition to our wedding day that allowed us to share our story, our hope for marriage, and the details of the day with our guests. 

Canva was my friend when it came to the written wedding details. I created these place card letters using Canva. It made it easy to match my colors and fonts in every aspect of our written details to look cohesive and streamline. It was a fun creative outlet that meant a lot to us! 

Having a friend photographing & filming our wedding |

We had good friends of ours photographing & filming our wedding day which was 11/10 the best decision! We had Morgan Gribble Photography & Noah Transeau Weddings capturing our wedding. It was so meaningful and important to Andy and I that we would have friends with us on our wedding day for every part. They made the day feel so effortless & comfortable from start to finish. If you’re in the DFW area or not – you should go with Morgan & Noah! They’re amazing!

Creating a theme for the wedding specific to us - hydrangeas |

This was honestly a last minute decision I made after changing my florals a few weeks before my wedding - OOPS! I decided that I wanted to add in a splash of color and chose to do so with blue hydrangeas! This informed the rest of my details I chose for the table scapes, guest notes, & color scheme. Once I added the hydrangeas to my bouquet, I went to the internet to find hydrangea napkins for my table scapes - I found the dreamiest set on Amazon from Two’s Company.  From here, I tried to incorporate hydrangeas in as much as I could. This was one of my favorite details of the day, and one that I was able to carry past our wedding day into our home decor & design!

Personalized gifts |

If you’ve found yourself wondering “What should I get for my bridesmaids?” or Googling “Father of the bride gifts,” say no more—I’ve got you covered!

I didn’t want to give our friends and family generic thank-you gifts for our wedding. I wanted each one to feel thoughtful, personal, and representative of Andy and me.

For my bridesmaids, I gave them matching hydrangea-print pajamas (to tie in with our theme, of course!) and a pair of gold hoop earrings with a delicate knot detail. It may seem simple, but I loved that I got to wear the same earrings on our big day. Now, whenever they wear theirs, I hope they think of our friendship and the special moment we shared.

I did something similar for my mom—she received beautiful pearl drop earrings with a knotted accent that matched mine. It was such a sweet, meaningful touch for just the two of us.

For my dad, I wanted to give him something deeply personal. I had a custom tie made with a childhood photo of the two of us and our special phrase: “I love everything about you.” We both sobbed during our first look when I gave it to him—it was such an sweet moment.

Andy’s mom received a necklace with the initials of both her sons and their wives—her two boys mean the world to her, and the gift meant so much. For Andy’s dad, we gifted an engraved Bible, which included a heartfelt letter from Andy inside.

And to make sure everyone felt appreciated, every single person in our wedding received a handwritten letter from us. There have been countless moments where Andy and I have felt cared for, celebrated, and cherished by our friends, and we wanted to return the favor. 

Incorporating our “phrase” into the details of our wedding |

Last, but certainly not least, the most meaningful detail from our wedding day that made it feel special was the different ways we were able to incorporate our phrase “day by day” into our wedding. 

The phrase “day by day” began when Andy & I were dating long distance, and we committed to one another to take our relationship one day at a time. We knew long distance was no small feat, and we wanted to pursue one another daily. Little did we know that this phrase would hold a two-fold meaning - not only were we continuing to pursue one another daily, but we were also practicing daily dependence on the Lord - doing day by day with HIM. 

Since this phrase has always been a part of our relationship, we knew it needed to be a part of our wedding day too. We incorporated this phrase on our wedding handouts, letters to our guests, and custom banner on that hung on our head table at our reception.

Not only did we include it in the decor, but we also included it in small gifts to our family, such as a workout towel for my mom and a blanket for Andy’s mom. Of all the gifts, though, Andy’s wedding band was my favorite incorporation of this detail. As a surprise, I had Andy’s wedding band engraved with our wedding date & our phrase. Now every time he puts on his ring, he gets to be reminded that his wife is choosing day by day with him & daily dependence on the Lord. 

I could go on and on about our wedding day & the many reasons it was special… but I’ll stop for now! If you’re in the thick of wedding planning, soak it all in!! It goes by quickly!!! If you’re just getting started & need some inspo, head over to my Pinterest & Amazon Storefront!

XO, 

Em

Los Angeles - Travel Diaries

Hi friends! 

Welcome to the newest segment on What’s Em Style! Travel Diaries – where I take you through all of the details of my stays and plays! 

In June, my husband and I played in Los Angeles, California! This was a bucket list item because I have never been to the West Coast, let alone California - man was it perfect! We stayed three days and three nights in the hustle and bustle of downtown LA, commonly referred to as DTLA. We stayed at an eclectic, moody, and serene boutique hotel called Hotel Per La. This hotel was a prime location for walking to restaurants, patisseries, coffee shops, and lounges. The suite we stayed in was ornately decorated with lively colors, collected artwork and photographs, and traditionally charming bathroom designs. We had a courtyard facing room with a romantically large bathtub in the main room. This room provided deep contrasts in the dark green and navy trim and doorways compared to the white walls and bedding. The natural light was impeccable. 

One reason we chose to stay in this hotel was the additional amenities it offered. There were multiple benefits packages to choose from, but the one we chose included a daily food & beverage stipend, access to the LA Athletic Club, and other amenities. The daily food & drink stipend came in handy as we got coffees from the hotel’s coffee shop, Cafe Ora, daily! Iced oat milk latte with sugar-free vanilla please!!!

For most of the days, I played solo as Andy was working. The hotel had plenty of things for me to explore. In the mornings, I parked myself in a comfy and stylish booth in their lobby/restaurant area to get some emails and What’s Em Style things done… as well as people watching. If you enjoy people watching as much as I do, 10/10 recommend going to a new state, sitting in your hotel lobby, and just observing those around you. It was so captivating to hear different accents, observe different styles, and watch different interactions. 

On day 2 of being in LA, I explored the rooftop pool area. It was quaint, quiet, & serene. Men and women sat with drinks in their hands and chatted about all the things. The women to my left gossiped about their friend’s new relationship, the gentleman to my right sat reading a book quietly, and the mother & daughter duo in front of me laughed and giggled with each sip of their drinks. I sat at the poolside for hours… again people watching, but also reading on my kindle. I am currently reading Hotel Nantucket by Elin Hildebrand. It was a slow start, but now I am invested in the lives of the employees at the Hotel Nantucket! 

Once Andy wrapped up his work for the day, we’d rendezvous at the hotel and head out on our nightly adventure!

Night 1 led us just one block down to the ever-charming Bottega Louie, a restaurant and patisserie that felt straight out of a movie. From the moment we were seated, we were welcomed with a warm basket of bread, a sleek glass bottle of water, and a softly glowing candle that set the mood perfectly. The ambiance was effortlessly elegant, and the food? Impeccable. We ordered their pepperoni pizza, and I’m not being dramatic when I say it was one of the best pizzas we’ve ever had—thin crust, just the right amount of spice, and bubbling with flavor.

After dinner, we made our way to the iconic Griffith Observatory, nestled high above the city. It was bustling with people—clearly a favorite among both tourists and locals—and parking took a bit of patience. But once we arrived, we learned the observatory was celebrating 90 years of stargazing! We even got to look through the largest telescope on-site and saw the moon. It was such a surreal, memorable moment. If you’re ever in LA, 10/10 recommend carving out time to visit the Griffith Observatory.

Night 2 was whimsical & joyous! We ventured out to Santa Monica, where we caught the sunset with our toes in the sand and the ocean breeze tangled in our hair. As we waded into the waves, Andy turned to me and asked what I thought—and all I could think was, “It smells different than the Gulf…” How Texas of me, right?

But truly, that night was the highlight of our entire trip. We giggled & laughed, splashed in the water, and strolled along the famous Santa Monica Pier. At the very end of the pier, we paused to take it all in: the glittering lights behind us, the dark blue horizon ahead, dotted with distant ships and rolling waves. It was absolutely breathtaking. Looking back, I think it’s safe to say… I miss Santa Monica the most.

I hope this post gave you inspiration & must-sees for your next visit to Los Angeles! For more on our time in California, head over to my TikTok for my day in the lifes & outfit of the days! For more on my outfits from our trip, take a look at my “Los Angeles Outfits” shelf on my ShopMy. 

XO, 

Em

5 Things I’m Taking into Summer

Maybe it’s the weather getting warmer in Dallas or my craving for a salad with strawberries, but I’ve got a good feeling about this summer! This summer is marked by a lot of new and exciting things for me and my husband. We will finally get to move into our house, the renovations will be complete, friends will have their babies, continuing to grow and create with What’s Em Style, and the celebration of one year of marriage! 

As I was on my morning walk this morning, I started to scroll on pinterest for my moodboard for the summer. I posted some of these photos on TikTok as a visual to the energy I am hoping to carry into the summer. I felt so inspired to think through things I want to take into the summer - some of which are tangible items and others are skills I want to develop! Nevertheless, this summer will be one of growth!

Atomic Habits by James Clear lays out an idea that we should strive to become 2% better weekly. These are small deposits made over a period of time that after a year, you should look back and see 104% growth in yourself.  I hope this inspires you to think of ways you want to improve this summer.

5 Things I’m Taking Into Summer 2025  ~ 

1. Summer Staples | 

Summer is all about the simple things! The style staples of summer are necessary when you are on vacation with your family or make a spontaneous decision to go get ice cream with your friends. I feel like my style has evolved over the last year from “College Emily” to “Summer Camp Emily” to “Young Professional Emily.” In my journey to find my style, I went back to the basics, and this summer shall be no different. 

When dressing during the summer, it should feel effortless… especially when you have your staples. My first staple to have in my closet this summer are dresses! I have declared this summer to be a dress summer! Functional, stylish, flowy, and easy. Some of my favorite dresses are from ASOS and Amazon! I have linked a couple on my wishlist on my Amazon Storefront. In the same vein of feeling effortless, I feel like a summer staple needs to be a throw-on-whenever pair of shoes. For me this year, I have decided those shoes will be my Birkenstock Boston clogs. Simple & easy… perfect for summer! 

Lastly, I feel like it is important to have your summer go-to outfit for if you and your friends are going out to dinner, you and your spouse are going on a froyo date, or you have a game night! My go-to outfit this summer are my jean shorts and classic white tee. I feel like I feel the most myself in this outfit, and as a bonus– I can just throw on my clogs! 

1. Summer Stripes | 

While we’re on the topic of style… STRIPES! Stripes everywhere please!!!

The pattern for this summer… well year round for me… is stripes. I have been eyeballing some striped dresses on Amazon that I can’t wait to purchase! Additionally, I have loved incorporating more stripes into my home decor in our new house (more content to come on that soon)! 

When we’re talking stripes, I’m talking about the quiet luxury stripes… you know the ones–the pin stripe, thin, classy ones. Stripes feel effortless and chic! They shouldn’t be too dramatic and loud, but quiet and gentle. 

1. Summer Simplicity | 

Next thing I am taking into summer is a clean and simple makeup routine! If you follow me on Tiktok, you have seen my makeup routine. I love my clean makeup products! This summer I want to lean more into simplifying it. 

Currently, I am obsessed with Merit’s minimalist stick in dune, flush balm in cheeky, and bronzing balm in quince. Additionally, I love using Saie’s tinted moisturizer and glowy super gel – all of these products are linked in my storefront under “Summer Essentials”. 

I feel like summer is also all about simple jewelry. I have always been a simple jewelry girl, and my go-to places to get jewelry are GLDN, enewton, and a small business called Shop Jenna Brooke. 

1. Summer Sundays | 

In the hustle & bustle of my everyday life here in Dallas, I feel like I have lost the art of resting and slowness with the Lord. This summer, my goal is to set aside my Sundays to intentionally rest with the Lord. I don’t just mean sleep in and go to the late service at church, but to truly take time to enjoy being in his presence. Psalm 16:11 has popped up a lot over the last couple of weeks reminding me that “In His presence, there is fullness of joy, and at His right hand are pleasures forevermore.” This is a truth I want to experience in more depth this summer. 

Some practical and tangible ways I want to do this is to start memorizing scripture. I used to be more disciplined in this area, but I have lost some of my steam here. Additionally, I want to continue journaling my prayers and inviting God into all that I am dreaming, desiring, and thinking–he cares! Lastly, as I already mentioned, I want to prioritize and capitalize on Sundays being my day of sabbath and slowness with the Lord.

1. Summer Specialty | 

Objectively, this is the thing I am most excited to take into the summer! I have never really been a hobby girl, but I am determined for this summer to be a hobby summer!!! Starting strong with this blog, I want to grow and develop this blog more this summer. I have always loved writing, but now I just have so many creative juices flowing, and I am eager to keep creating. Same goes for TikTok, I have loved having my TikTok as a creative outlet for me! 

In the general theme of slowing down this summer, I want to read more. I received a Kindle Paperwhite for Christmas last year, and I have so many books I am excited to read on it. I also want to get into embroidery. I love the classy look of a monogram on everything, and I am craving the art of learning a new skill. I’m thinking towels, wreath sashes, cocktail napkins, you name it!!!

The common theme in all of this is evident, I crave slowness and simplicity. This summer is all about that for me. Whether it's through learning hobbies that naturally create slowness or styling clothes that feel effortless, I am all about it for this summer. If you want to join me in this journey, follow me on TikTok, come back to this blog every Friday, and visit my Amazon Storefront for a list of all the essentials and staples I mentioned in today’s blog. 

XO, 

Em

As seen on Pinterest!

Making a Dream into a Reality

Hi there!

Thanks for stopping by! Welcome to What’s Em Style – my little corner of the internet to explore my more creative side. With what began as an idea, led to a dream, and is now launching into a reality. I am overjoyed at the opportunity to write and express, in words, all the things I love.

This blog is for the girl who enjoys the finer things in life, who relishes in the Nancy Myers aesthetic, who could spend hours scrolling on Pinterest, who finds joy in taking care of her body, and who finds life in Jesus. 

Ever since I was a little girl, I enjoyed writing. I would write short stories for my parents in elementary school. I wrote personal narratives, poems, and short stories in high school (I even won some awards - my claim to fame). In 2020, when the world shut down, I took to the internet to write on a different blog than this one, another blog named Grace Abounds to encourage others in a time where there was so much uncertainty and fear. I stopped writing in college out of a lack of time, not desire. Recently, the desire has been stirred more as I have been seeking to find an outlet to be creative as a young adult, newly married, trying to navigate post-grad… how hard could that be? Well, as I continued to crave creativity, I began to dream about writing for a personal blog again, and this is how I turned my dream into a reality! And you can too! 

Here are 5 practical ways I made this dream a reality:

01. Capture the dream

Start big or start small, but just start! I began dreaming of What’s Em Style during a season of immense stress and drain in my life. A friend pointed out a craving for slowness and creativity in my life that I hadn’t yet recognized. Upon this revelation, I sat down to journal out my thoughts, prayers, and desires. 

I am a visual person, so I began to draw out my thoughts with circles and arrows and squiggly lines. I noticed patterns in my time of journaling all pointing to a creative platform to express my thoughts about topics that I love. Thus, the idea of What’s Em Style was born.

What was once started as a silly Instagram page for posting my neutral outfits, became a place to post content that I found joy in as a creative outlet, which is not developing into a dream of having a space to write about topics that I love!

02. Cast a vision, direction, and goal

There are a lot of things I could say here. When I started dreaming, I had many squirrly thoughts about what I could do, where I could go, how would this work, etc. I could see the potential, but not the direction. I went back to my journal, to my prayers and to my dreaming thoughts to develop a vision and goals for What’s Em Style. 

I knew I wanted this blog to mean something to people. I thought to myself, “what do I enjoy reading?” and “what content do I enjoy seeing?” These questions bred my direction and vision for this platform. Think of it like a cupcake. I wanted to create a space for people to read simple blog entries that would be sweet and rich simultaneously. Rather than choosing a niche to write about, I am choosing to write for myself on topics I love. This would be the base of the cupcake. My personal life and faith would be the sprinkles on top. My ultimate goal in all of this is to use a gift that I have, writing, to communicate to others my joy for life, homemaking, design, health, and style. 

03. Consider those who have gone before you

Naturally, I didn’t even know where to begin… I mean I kind of did, but not on the scale that I was dreaming of. So, I went to Pinterest (as one does) to seek out advice from those who have gone before me in creating a digital media platform. What I found was more than just the “how to’s” of starting a blog, but the heart behind why you would start it. Sure, it’s nice to have the best website and growing platforms, but that means nothing if your heart isn’t in it fully. 

I read so many blog posts on starting a blog, developing a brand, what to do & what not to do, how to invest your time to promote growth etc. Purposeful Dreamers, Taylor Stanford, & PHMillenia were only a few who inspired me to take the next few steps in making my dream into a reality. 

04. Create a platform

Now it’s time to get practical. I had the dream, the research, and the direction I wanted to go with What’s Em Style, and it was time to bring it all together. When creating this blog, I looked into multiple different blogging platforms, what they offered, and ultimately, I decided to use SquareSpace as my platform. 

As I developed the website, I also wanted to consider the brand I was creating as well. I considered what colors to use, the fonts I would stick with, and the style of the website. I wanted to make sure every detail was streamlined across every platform. What I mean by this is that I wanted my blog to match my Instagram, TikTok, Pinterest, etc. I used Canva to streamline all of these platforms to create my branding for What’s Em Style. 

I found a lot of joy in this part of the process because I was able to see all of the pieces coming together… finally! I loved playing around with blues and greens to find the shades I was looking for. I cared deeply about which fonts I used to communicate the feminism, sophistication, authenticity, and approachability of this space for all readers alike. I learned that there can be a lot that is communicated in the colors, fonts, wording, and images I chose to use on this blog. Every decision and detail was intentionally made to create a platform I am proud of & eager to share!  

05. Cultivate your reality

Post. Publish. Promote. This is the final step in making this dream a reality. Its as simple as just doing what you set out to do. What this looks like for me is simply writing. Planning blog posts. Creating matching Instagram main grid posts and stories. Publishing to Pinterest. All the above to cultivate this reality!

I hope this blog meets you where you’re at everytime you visit this page. Whether in your drought of life or your wellspring of creativity and wellness. Let’s be friends and take on this dream together!

XO, 

Em